We all have this beautiful perfect pictures in our head how we want our relationship to be, the kind of people we want to be with, how we will care and cherish them and how we wish to be treated by them and to live happily ever after.

But most often these pictures don’t transform into reality even when we have the Mr or Miss right our live. Relationship failure is a thing of great concern people are separating every day. I have asked the question why and i wish to share my finding’s with you in this article, read on

Reason why relationships fail are not far fetched they are within reach. relationship fail as a result of the neglect of little things that matters most in a relationship.

We tend to neglect these issue’s, most times intentionally some other time out of ignorant not knowing that they are the life of a relationship. They are to relationship what fuel is to the car . when there are issues in a relationship we some times refuse to look inward where the problem lays rather we prefer to look outside.

It Is common to see guys buy expensive gifts for their girlfriend in other to settle issues between them,but that is never enough.

Please don’t get me wrong its good to exchange gift in a relationship in fact just 2 days ago I bought some gift my girlfriend,what am saying here is that gift should not take the center stage less the main issue threatening the relationship will be left by the side unsolved its will not off rather continue to grow and eat up the relationship.

These are the 8 main reason why relationships fail

here they are strokes that break the Carmel back ;


lack of communication,

lack of respect ,

lie (foundation),

Compatibility issue,

trust issue ,

different priorities,

time and effort.

When all these are lacking or inadequate in a relationship the relationship can be likened to a ship in an empty ocean.

Come with me let’s break it dawn

8 main reason why relationships fail

1. Love

Love is a Beautiful thing yes I know. Can love alone sustain a relationship No. Back in the days, where i come from there is this popular line guys use when asking a girl out ,they will say ” I love you pass my mother”.

Now what I want to say here is that love is never enough to sustain a relationship and that’s one of the main reason relationships fail nowadays.

Relationship build solely on love is like a timed bomb waiting to happen. At the beginning everything will look great and rosy but give it some time it will fade away gently, when other times that build up a relationship is not there.

In fact the two lovers will start irritating each other because they don’t have any other things going for them and next thing you will hear is I hate you . this is why its common to see youth fall in love today move in together tomorrow fight and break up this next day.


In a relationship as well as other aspect of human life like business trust is build and nurtured,it don’t come by waving a magic wand. It takes time to earn someone trust but its very simple to lose that trust just a single lie and the trust is lost .

Trust issue is a very delicate issue because it gently eat up a relationship without you knowing it . When partners don’t trust themselves silently it bring unspoken hate among then and two cannot walk together if they don’t agree .

So when ever there is mistrust in a relationship, issue’s like insecurity and safety comes up. a lot of things can cause mistrust in a relationship but not limited to infidelity, past event, lies, keeping secret.
Mistrust often bring more relationship issue with it ,like


this is a direct offspring of mistrust the affected partner often do things in I don’t care ways . it is common to hear people say I sleep with B because he slept with A. all this lead the relationship to one direction which rock and once it hit the rock breakup is next.


Mistrust brings about insecurity in a relationship and it create unhealthy environment.

3. Lack of Communication

This is tricky because communication in a relationship not just about “gisting” and gossiping with your partner it goes deeper than that, relationship fail easily when couple fail to discus things that affects them.

Some persons are very good at hiding how they feel they can talk and laugh with you for a whole day and still will not tell you how they really feel inside.

The work of communication in a relationship can not be overemphasize it is like a bridge that connect two road remove it and both parties goes different direction.

Don’t forget that every relationship started from communication, feed and live on communication when two people in a relationship forget this that’s the end because communication is the life of a relationship. without communication there will be no understanding nor agreement.

Lack of communication bring frustration and unending argument sometimes you find out that you two can not have a single conversation without without arguing .it often start with little matters like unspoken hurt and grow to threaten the relationship. Some argument is born out of poor communication not being open to each other.

4 Lack of respect

It feel’s good to have a respectful partner no two ways about it. Respect in a relationship is a thing of pride and it boost confidence. It should not be one sided, mind you its give and take.

When there is no respect in a relationship or the respect is not reciprocated its a thing of concern because relationship a partnership and just like in business world each partner deserve respect.

It is very important to be in a relationship with someone you respect. Some of the abuse people go through in a relationship are born out of disrespect. These abuse could be physical,emotional, psychological or verbal and no relationship will survive in that kind of toxic environment it rather die.

5 Different priorities

We go into relationship for different reasons and with different mind set. Most relationship fail because of misplaced priority. Relationship fail because of what individual decide to do at a particular point in there relationship.

Some couple does start on same foot but deviate along the line. What could be the problem ?

Lets look at it this way, issue of different priorities in a relationship occur when one party in the relationship do to one reason or the other decided to change direct. Things that could claim responsibilities for this include ;

Lack of communication



Personal decision;

Personal decision in the sense that some people enter into relationship for fun or other things best known to then, so when they are done having fun the relationship fail.

No matter the effort of the other party. In some cases the victim will be made to look like the villain and he or she will shoulder the blame.

6 Compatibility issue

Believe me no two individuals are the same even identical twins has different taste for things , but that not withstanding, for two persons to survive in a relationship they have to be compatible.

You cannot throw a cat and rat in the same room and expect then to survive and mingle together that’s not possible and this also apply in a relationship if the parties are not compatible the result is obvious there is breakup.

Compatibility mostly has to do with three things ;

Physical attraction

This the chemistry that flow between 2 love birds. feeling of completeness when your together

Emotion Compatibility

This has to do with the emotional connection safety and fulfillment

Intellectual Compatibility

Understanding of each other in term of communication the balance in the flow of conversation and so on

Spiritual Compatibility

Do you agree in many things as it pertain to life. Do you see things from the same or different angle.

7 Lies

Relationship build on Lie’s is like a house build on sand without foundation,no matter how beautiful or strong it looks it can never stand the test of time. Its just a matter of time before it fall and when it does people get hurt mostly the innocent partner.

Relationship failure nowadays is attributed to foundation issues that is building on Lie’s. Building relationship on lies is one of the most painful reason why relationship fail. it get messy crush emotions an destroys life.

Imagine finding out one day that someone that you loved, trust and cherished has been lying to you for as many years you guys have been together. Oh! That’s so sad

8 Time ,attention and effort

There is no perfect relationship believe it or leave it,real life relationship is different from what we see in the movie. Have you ever ask your favorite couple how they have managed to stay happy together for a long time some will tell you that they invested time and made sacrifice alone the line .

In a relationship all days will not be rosy, someday will be sunny some other rainy it all rest on the couple to make it work.

In summary

Relationship failure can be as a result of one or combination of the 8 factors discussed above.

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About Shedrach 13 Articles
Am Shedrach, a graduate of Estate surveying and valuation. Am an entrepreneur, a writer and a blogger

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